If you don't know who the Krampus is, or why Santa might want to be killing him, strap yourselves in because it's kind of amazing. Once upon a time some parents thought it wasn't enough to threaten that if children misbehaved, they wouldn't get their share of free stuff at Christmas. No, back in the day Santa had an evil counterpart who crept into the beds of naughty children to stuff them in his canvas bag and steal them away into the night, never to see their parents again. In the English-speaking world this was Black Peter, an ape-like man in blackface, just to make it even more offensive. But in Germany, Black Peter became the Krampus, and was upgraded to have horns and chains and usually a giant tongue. German legends have way cooler badguys, that is a fact.
Anyway, it stands to reason that Santa, champion of childrens' hearts, would take issue with the Krampus and its nightmare ways and thus a centuries-long battle would begin and end, here, today, on this very blog entry, with Santa as ultimate the victor.
Hey, do you guys think I need a cooler signature? I kind of just write my name, I think maybe I should add some flourish or something. I don't know, I'll work on it.
